I'm alive

This is a quick post for a lovely Newtown net cafe to say I'm still alive and will be responding to correspondence and soon I hope.

Unfortunately my life, my stupidly hectic work schedule (stupid top secret projects...GAH!) , a broken Iphone, a damaged home internet connection and computer, and a death in the family have converged to make a perfect storm of internet isolation ( I haven't been on facebook for almost a month... gasp!) but Iphone is returned tomorrow, technician visits on Wednesday and I should be able to actually spend time playing catch up and doing what I want/need to do.

Fierce Flesh: Fabulous, Picture Heavy, NSFW

I was super lucky to go with the amzingsuperwonderful Frances to the "Fierce Flesh" in one of my favourite performance spaces in Sydney The Red Rattler.

I have been asked to remove the images of the night and I'm going to, In a moment sheer naievety stupidity I forgot about the people whose images I had taken and posted, I wanted to share how great a night it was with folks who couldn't attend. I stupidly thought of that the other people taking snaps would be sharing theirs on their blogs and facebooks and it would be fine... but alas it was not. Fierce Flesh was a small community event in a protected space any by posting images of the event without consent I have voilated that space even thought my intention was to share the greatness of the event.


I am taking steps now and have removed all images from here and my tumblr and emailing or asking everyone who sees it to email me and advise me so I can request removal or request removal yourself.


Again I am sorry for this to all the people involved about the way I did this.

Fat Fashion Feft: City Chic Responded, now I respond to them (about bloody time ) with added snark

First of I should of written this earlier but I'm a busy individual with a full time job and weekends devoted to drinking cask wine and catching up on my stories  various philanthropic ventures and so pointing out things which I think are injustices in the plus size fashion world just fell to the back burner but I am back and I have time to spare before Jersey Shore Joan Sutherland in Lakme comes on the television.

Anyway if you missed out the previous episodes on Why Kiki? Why? I wrote this  then I tweeted this then the amaxing Zoe from Axis of Fat wrote this then some lovely folk linked me on here and then City Chic responded. Easy huh?

And here is their response.

Thanks so much for your feedback, we are flattered that you think of our brand with fantastic designers like JIBRI. We support all plus fashion brands and want the fashion industry to include plus designers more in the industry to give them opportunity to grow their business.

My name is Lucy Doyle and I am the senior Designer at City chic, and I am also a size 18 and wear all of our clothes. I am very passionate about the plus size industry and our brand and our customers. The first response in our facebook page was from our social media team, I would like to give my response to the blog post.

In relation to the inspiration for the Plus Size ruffle Front Halter you are saying we “Copied” from Jibri I can assure you that this was not the case. The styling in black and white is classic, the halter neck shape and fitted body are shapes that work for our customer and the pleating trim is a very important trend this season. Any likeness to another design is purely coincidental and in some ways not surprising as the elements of this style are both classic and on trend.

As you can see at the links below, this fashion trend has been very strong in the regular size fashion brands this season with brands like BCBG MAX AZRIA (Bottom of Form) adopting this style.

http://bit.ly/c1CmCd
http://bit.ly/a2SDCl
http://bit.ly/a4ZqP2

We ordered this garment in March this year as we predicted this as a trend for the season. Jibri bough this out on June the 28th and by this stage we had almost completed sampling. It was not physically possible for us to have copied the garment as you state as we had designed this before JIBRI offered it for sale.
The fact that you consider us to be as on trend and fashion forward as an up and coming designer is flattering for city chic. I review each piece of our range and focus on getting the trend and fit right for our customer, and it is great to know we are up there with the top designers.

In regards to price the $90 US price does not include tax and would relate to about $100 AUD after exchange rate. If you then add the 10% GST we need to charge in Australia it would be $110. Our price at $79.95 is 30% cheaper to provide you the same quality in a retail store environment that involves significantly greater cost than on-line only retailing.

We take all feedback very seriously at City Chic and want to say thanks for being part of the plus fashion industry.

Lucy 


Now back to a normal font... now maybe a little bolder



Dear Lucy, and the rest of City Chic and any other kind people reading hey! thanks for taking the time to respond to my rantings.




Yes theres no such thing as copyright in design, and yes suggesting that you stole the design was probably strong phrase to use but there are the reasons why I was pissed off.


I was am upset because deep down inside my optimistic self would like to think that designers like yourself would be immersed as much as I am (and countless others)  in the plus size fashion market space would be aware of what the other brands both independent and chain store are bringing out into the market and taking considered measures to make sure that nobody is stepping on anybody's toes, The plus size fashion industry is small and "Stupid Optimistic Kiki" thought there was some kind of bond between the brands as you are all catering for a far too long neglected demographic.  Not to mention Bloggers that you have tried to affiliate and align with your brand and about four hundred other bloggers have referred to this design and designer several times well before the June 28th date that you refer to in your response, here, here, here and here (just do a google blog search for Jibri theres a bucket load)


I'm just going to assume someone in your design department saw it once forgot about it and then thought about it again earlier this year. I know you believe something to the contrary but logical ol me would prefer to think of it that way, and it's really the nicest and most plausible outcome.


Oh yeah while I'm here can someone talk to someone in the "naming of clothing department" because this pair of  skinny jeans should not have the same name as another Australian designers plus size skinny jeans


Love 


Kiki


P.S can you send me some free stuff, you know you wanna.

Outfit: meh it's missing my legs and and blurry but it shows my new haircut

 Dress : ASOS Curve

Jacket: Beth Ditto 2009 collection

Sunglasses: Karen Walker: Sir Bookies in Clear 

Scarf: Found it on the street

On my legs are opaque stockings on my feet are in Evans flats (but you'll have to take my word for that)

Yeah not I got me a short back and sides y'know so I'm like Rhianna except without the autotune. so any opinions about my new do? eh like I care I can't re grow it in a hurry.

Oh yeah so also whilst I was buying gluten free hippy crap at the markets I got tapped on the shoulder by the fabulous Kelli Jean Drinkwater handing out pamphlets for this fab event  a couple of days after being told about it by the Awesome Frances I bit my tounge and was trying to be all cool but yeah I was all squealy on the inside she is soo hot in person. so yeah I'll be going... WILL YOU?

  Ooh and because everyone who reads a fashion blog likes to see a picture of the exact same thing but at a slightly different angle here's another photo. I look serious and according to my brother a touch haggard without my make-up on.

 

Ok these were really my brother fooling around taking photos before we went to the markets. but yeah it counts as a considered outfit blog post.

There's this thought amongst various sub cultures and groups in Australia that the size of the hoop of your earrings is directionally proportionate to how much of a slut you are (or how big your clacker is love). This thought really has driven me away from wearing hoop earrings, that and they always got tangled in my hair and my clothes and they just are so obvious but now with my new shorn do, I'm gonna be all about the earrings until I get injured trying to take a t-shirt off with them on.

I must say a most heartfelt thankyou for the responses, comments, repostings and tweets re: my last entry about City Chic and they have taken the time to answer. I'm trying to compose an eloquent and composed response but those are two qualities that I don't possess when it comes to issues such as these but it shall be up in a few days depending on my day to day life. I have actually been taking a blog holiday this last few weeks basically because it's nice to have a break so I havent' read a single thing that a blogger has posted (with the exception of the great story about the CityChic vs Jibri thing here on Axis of Fat ) so I have avoided all this Beth Ditto hullabaloo and whatever else has been happening on the interwebz, I plan on catching up tomorrow... or drinking and watching Invader Zim

Fat Fashion Feft : Why Kiki? Why? says NO!

Holy Fuckbuckets I am so pissed off right now I'm writing this on my tiny phone screen on the way home from work GAHHHHH!

Look at this top from City Chic's new Spanish Rose line! it's cute, sassy, versatile and oh wait... It's fucking stolen!!!!!!

City Chic: Bumba Shirt $79.95

Does it look familiar? Oh yeah it's a blatant rip off of Independent Plus Size designer Jibri's trademark halter shirt.

Jibri Ruffle Halter Shirt. $90 usd

Now you are probably thinking "oh Kiki! you are just being all mean about City Chic because you are grumpy because you have low blood sugar and you really just want a cookie" and then I would scream "piss off! who asked you? where's this cookie?"

But this isn't ooh City Chic's " let's make something inspired by Sass and Bide because they'll never make a plus size version" this isn't "let's remake a version of a Roland Mouret galaxy dress that's not only plus sized but cheaper too so we can make a great style accessible to the masses"

This is the theft of the design of small Plus sized retailer who provided this shirt custom made at a reasonable price in a variety of Plus sizes and then has the sheer gall to offer the Mass produced option at close to the exact price! No extension of the sizes offered by Jibri no original print or colourway just plain theft.

Now most of you will probably read this go yeah that kinda sucks and continue to shop there because of the lack of plus size options (or maybe you are holding out on the criticism so they will send you stuff to review...ducks) But if you are the slightest bit peeved pass the word on about this so that people know that Jibri provides great unique styles for fats and That City Chic didn't come up with this design.

To quote Derryn Hinch;

SHAME City Chic SHAME




Edited to add:

Thanks for the publicity and linkage folks I was wondering why all of a sudden more than two people a day were visiting here;

I particularly love the part of City Chic's comment "it's here for you to have, not only for plus sized ladies to wear, but at a fraction of the price!!!"
All I can say is that the Style was already being offered to Plus size ladies  and yes $79.95 from $90 (usd to aud is a frickin dream conversion rate at the moment) is a fraction (is it a decent saving on the original?) so you are right thankyou City Chic for offering me an item that is ten bucks cheaper.

And yes I am aware that there is no such thing as copyright in fashion and the use of the word Rip Off is probably not appropriate (and probably neither is the use of blatant theft but I'm a blogger and whatever for Journalistic integrity and shit) but it doesn't mean it's right or fair, it's one thing to be inspired by Chanel/ Gucci/ Insert big fashion house here, it's completely another to be inspired to design and to "style" a clothing item by a lone small business designer that had been heavily promoted by Bloggers that your brand itself has tried to align itself with.

Welcome to all you lovely people who are visiting me for the first time today alot of you that are clicking here from the Facebook link 

I don't have much else to say about this but while you are here come have a look at some interesting links to the left and some wonderful communities that are related to being Plus sized

- the fat-o-sphere http://feeds.feedburner.com/FatFuNotesFromTheFatospherehttp://community.livejournal.com/fatshionista/ or the Fatshionista flickr pool  

Or that you can find a variety of Plus size stores from Overseas and order more and get it delivered for cheaper from Evans.co.uk, ASOS.com, Yoursclothing.co.uk, Dorothy Perkins, Torrid and Faith 21 or even something Custom made on Etsy and could get a whole outfit delivered for the price of a mini dress from City Chic.

Better still swing by these great Aussie brands

http://www.dreamdiva.com.au/

http://entitled.com.au/

http://www.embodydenim.com.au/

http://www.monroefashion.com.au/store/

http://www.autographfashion.com.au/

http://www.mline.com.au/

There is a surprising lot of choice out there beyond City Chic and trust me when I say City Chic will get better if you start shopping around more.

- Posted using BlogPress from my phone

Location:,Enmore,Australia

Outfit: Another Half Assed outfit post by your favourite half assed fatshion blogger

Glasses: Karen Walker (natch) 

T-shirt: Found it on the floor 

Necklace: Diva necklace and a bit of lincraft gold chain fused together

Bangles: they are giant friendship bracelets made out of cut up t-shirts

Jacket: Beth Ditto for Evans

Jeans: they also came from the floor (it's my favourite place for clothes) 

Brother and I were walking to the bus stop and he went "ooh graffiti! I'm taking a picture!" then I went "ooh shit I still have that blog thing take a photo of me so I can show complete stranger what I wore to the shops" then brother assumed that "Outfit blog" was a code for S&M dating website then I tried to correct him but I'm sure that he still is thinking S&M oh well (does anyone else think about M&Ms when someone talks about S&M?... anyone?) But look it's another tried and true fashion blog background and it makes my boring t-shirt and jeans look Gangsta Yo! (is that how you say it peeps) Actually the above photo is my most favourite photo of me for a very long time. Go Brother.

What the fuck is with that pose? Look I have a claw. I need to try harder at this to look more fashionable

Ooh look at my $6 sandals from Kmart I bought them to do this with but they are mighty comfy so I'll leave these for now and pimp another pair in the near future.

Outfit: same old, same old but this time in sepia. Plus some whingeing about Evans customer service

Yawn... today's outfit is an old My Size sweater dress (worn backwards) a Sara Cardigan, generic black leggings and my Payless leatherette combat boots, the belt is a DIY job and the headscarf is thrifted natch.

The belt I made by sewing the buckle off a size zero belt I got for a dollar from Valley girl onto some wide width elastic and for about half an hour of actual work I have a custom made belt.

Hopefully when I get some time I will sort out this dear old page into something a tad more coherent and get these links sorted out as well and catch up on the blogosphere (shit hey blogosphere was in my spell checker as a proper word!)

Oh yeah if you were following up on me and my missing Evans order that I mentioned a few times on my twitter (@whykikiwhy follow me... please) well over one month, three International phone calls, 1 attempt to communicate via their twitter team (@evansclothing) and I got my money back minus postage (?) on my third call into customer service after they realized that just forgot to process my refund. It's not a big deal (I'm a grown up) except the items I specifically ordered no longer exist and I still had to pay for their failed attempt to send me something and to chase it up as lost parcels can only be investigated after a call into the centre. Oh and be warned international buyers, Evans stops tracking once the order leaves the UK, you have to wait three weeks before you can lodge a lost parcel request and they might forget about you all together even if you have made several successful purchases with them previously.

Oh well Caveat Emptor or some other Latin that means "it sucks to be me without my leather wide fitting industrial looking sandals"

- done via BlogPress from my iPhone

Outfit: shit I forgot I had a blog so here's me without a decent nights sleep drinking crap coffee

Ooh look at that smokin steely gaze yes it's a generic lazy work outfit, T-shirt is black my slacks are black my jacket is black, my mother is black.

But my scarves... are wondrous bright things that help differentiate myself from the dirty Inner West Emo hipsters and the the Goths.

Today's outfit has two scarves tied together to make one longer scarf then the subsequently tied around my delicate bird like neck to shield me from the elements/ draw attention to my boobies/ catch crumbs.

How do you wear your scarves? are you like me and chuck on as many as you can?

Apologies for my delayed absence of late, my schedule has meant I'm pretty much contained to iPhone internet access on my commute. But again thank you for such lovely comments (seem to see them a week after they happen) they are the reason I get up in the morning that and an overwhelming urge to pee.

I also have started me a tumblr at http://whykikiwhy.tumblr.com if you need more whykikiwhy in your life.


- done via BlogPress from my iPhone

Outfit: look Ma! she's all stripy

Headscarf: Thrifted
Sunglasses: Karen Walker (Gee Devotee)
Sweater dress: My Size
Cardigan: Monroe
Leggings: Evans
Combat Boots: Payless

 I was doing my monthly rummage through Myer City stores sale rack (it pretty much in my opinion the best place in Sydney to find a good quality new fat chick bargain) and saw this marked down 50% from the lowest marked down price (original RRP $120 I paid $40) and I thought lets give it a crack. I looks good (the stripes are angled on the back) and lightweight and will be a great trans-seasonal piece, but it feels cheapish and definitely not worth $120 but a decent striped cardigan has been on my to buy list and I found one and it'll do.

Oh Overseas folk and probably not many Aussies even know about this Monroe brand, it's the plus size diffusion range of the big Australian brand Bardot and is sold directly through the Department store chain Myer and via their website. Targeted at 18-35 the range is mainly stocked with more professional on-trend styles and basic styles. I personally like the brand and hope that they get a bunch more support because I think the Australian youth plus size market really needs more fashionable, professional, classic, work/play clothing that isn't as farted out thoughtless  (I don't want to use that term but it's the only ones that come to mind)  as City Chic or Dream Divas offerings.

Outfit: Mothhole ridden cashmere is still cashmere especially when it fits and was only $3

Glasses: Zenni Optical

Necklace: Diva

Turtleneck: New Zealand cashmere (thrifted) 

Stockings: We love Colours

Skirt: Evans

Shoes: Rockport (thrifted) 

Not much to report it's winter it's coldish and it hasn't stopped fucking raining. I should be in Queensland at Splendour in the Grass right now but I'm not because I'm poor and need to save up my annual leave as I used it all up on lasts years festival and about ten other music festivals (yes I am quite the festival whore)

I love me the skivvy/ turtleneck thingy it's pure cashmere black and yeah it has a few holes but darning is so frickin easy to do and with black wool most of my half assed darning has disappeared into the garment.

Skirt is from Evans from a sale a while back, I got it and it was  too big and the lining kept on shitting me so I tore it out and  took it in to look more slutty because as we all know we should be using out natural gifts (like my spectacularrrr derrière ) and displaying them to their full potential in order to snag Mr Right (please don't tell my boyfriend that I'm out husband hunting at work)

I need to do something with my hair.

I need to do something with my lounge-room wall posters are not very grown up.

I need to grow up probably first.

And the Winner of my hidden giveaway for a fabulous pair of Karen Walker sunglasses is...

I was meant to write this up earlier but my internetery hs been confined to Ye Olde Iphone and thus difficult to y'know do blogging shit.

Of these fabulous RRP $329 sunglasses.

NUMBER 10 which by my calculations was (by order of entries everyone's favourite purveyor of all that is fancy Natalie of Definatalie  and frankly I could not be happier a) she had bazillion entries in this frickin draw b) She is all that is fabulous c) she's an Artist and by giving her free shit I am nurturing the Australian art scene (which in turn gives me a lovely smug sense of satisfaction)

And not only did she get some Sunnies but also I chucked in smidge of vintage and a touch of deadstock which I guessed would fit (based on some mild stalkering on my part)I hope she likes the extras

Edited to add Ooh Look here doesn't she look perfect in them?

 Again thank you to the fabulous comments and entries in the competition and  I wish I had a pair of Karen Walker Sunglasses to give to you all (even if it would send me broke)

Oh and if you are asking yourself what competition? it was hidden in the bottom of this entry un highlighted after a very dull outfit post indeed. But I think that's how I'm going to roll from now on because you know I have more fabulous free shit to give away.

this is why I don't do too many outfit pictures

Top: Beth Ditto for Evans
Jacket: Beth Ditto for Evans
Jeans: Embody Denim Ice Queens

Most of the time my outfit photos they end up looking like this.

I think I'll include something deep here like this picture and my clothing choices of late have been a reflection of my inner despair and compare my situation to something from that girl in that Twilight. Ooh go Team Aloysius! I've never seen the movies or read the books based on the movies or the reviews of the movies gotta be an Aloysius right? and if there is I will back him (unless he's a pedophile or something)

Anyway I should quote Ani Di Franco or Ke$ha or something.



- done via BlogPress from my iPhone

Outfit: what I wore Sunday Afternoon whilst lazing around, avoiding doing anything whatsoever.

Cardigan: Sara

T-shirt: ASOS curve

Jeans: Embody Denim (bodylove style)

Shoes: Kmart

Head Scarf: Leona Edminston (few seasons back now)

Bracelet: Handmade

Sunglasses: Karen Walker (Sir Bookie Style)

So back to regular posting; this is  another generic bumming around outfit post because the only time I actually have time to post one of these bloody posts is when I am doing nothing but bumming around. I could of put something fab on and pretended I was off to something but I wasn't and I'm all for this page to be a reflection of what I actually wore out of the house instead of look at the stuff I bought (or pestered a retailer to send me free shit ;-P) style blog.

Speaking about Shit I bought 

a) the ASOS curve T-shirt: it's comfy it's cute and the price was right at 3 pounds on sale I wouldn't pay their recommended retail price for it or most other of their knit items I am quickly finding out  the wuality is not what I am accustomed to (hello elephant scrotum dress) but it covers my tits and demonstrates my lifelong allegiance to the fox.

b) my Embody Denim jeans... Oh how do I love thee? let me count the ways this is my now third pair (I also own the Fevers and the Ice Queen styles) and I saw a pair of BodyLoves on sale on the Ebay and I thought I had to. You can barely see them in the photo and most likely won't wear them out galavanting (calves too tight even though they are bootleg cut) but with no fly and the best waistband ever these pants are the best tracksuit pants killer for lazy days. and yes I know they are technically Maternity pants and I'm not pregnant but seriously with the leave and the goverment benefits (in Australia) and the elasticised everything Breeders have had it too good for too long and I want me some maternity shit! It's comfy as.

c) My newest pair of Karen Walker Sunnies the Sir Bookies!!!!

See how they make me look smarter?
They are big and black and beautiful, there was a sale and they were cheap so I go them and they have improved my life significantly since their purchase.

Ooh baby aren't they the sexiest thing you have ever seen?


Anyways where was I? oh yeah, when I was looking at them and trying them on and relishing the sheer fabulosity they brought to my face, I thought to myself, "gee wiz the blog-o-sphere has been so nice to me of late and I really like them a whole lot how do I thank them for being nice and friendly on the twitter and on the livejournal and especially here at whykikiwhy.blogspot.com without seeming like a right attention whore?"

Well the answer came to me and I purchased two pairs of these delicious sunglasses one for myself and one to give away to one of you dearest darling readers.

Yes Seriously.

Now unfortunately like all good things in life there are conditions, and rules and terms and more conditons and to keep things fair I have to include them.

I'm not going to make you follow me on facebook  (I don't like using it) on Google friend connect (it's for suckers.. or I can't figure out how it works) or tweet about me (I hate those I just entered a giveaway at blog and you should too tweets) I'm not doing this to get readers, in fact I'd prefer it if you kept it between us y'know because secrets are cool and shit. In fact other than this entry I will not mention this giveaway other than this highlighted bit of text at the bottom of an OOTD post until I draw the prize on Sunday the 25th July 10:30pm Sydney Time. AEST GMT +10

So what do you do?
a) leave a comment at the bottom of this entry with your email address (best format would be ?????AT????DOT???) and that gives you one entry
b) if you have had a permanent link to me on your blog or website (before today 18/07/10... I can check this) include that in your comment you get ten more entries
OR
 if you don't have a blog or even if you do but didn't have a link to me and follow me on twitter (before today 18/07/10... I can check this too) include your twitter name and you get five more entries
OR
if you don't have either blog or twitter but have left a comment previously or emailed me previously you get 5 more entries mention that in your comment as to which entry you left a comment or when you emailed me

That's it and using random.org I'll choose a winner I don't expect too many entries (meaning more of a chance to win). And again thank you everybody for being so fab!

Outfit: drawn together (aka what I wore to work and hastily sketched because I keep on forgetting to take photos of me in my outfits)

Elephant Scrotum Dress- ASOS curve.

Oversized Black cardigan: Kirrily Johnston LOVES Maxshop.

Red belt: got it out of a kinder surprise

Sheer stockings: left over from my Bank robbery days.

Combat boots: Payless

Hiking socks: the Hiking sock store.

I haven't been on the Internet much as blogging is something that takes valuable time that could be better utilized by myself downloading the entire series of Maude and being sick (it's winter here in the mystical land of OZ so everyone is a sniffle) and also as a "corporate whore" my John (that's corporate whorese for employer) requires me to attend to my job around five days a week.

Anyways I do have a lot of stuff to catch up on re the blog and lots of fabulous and hideous things to show you.

Now onto the outfit, I wore this yesterday to work and after yesterdays outing I formally demoted Scrotum dress down to nightie as it is formally a piece of shit. This is the only item of clothing i have bought that has doubled in size with every wear and is wider than it is long, the neck grew so wide that I had to pin it to my bra to wear. Even last night as I wore it as nightie it didn't stay on.

The cardigan however is uhmayzing! it's the Maxshop loves Kirrily Johnston empire cardigan dress that I hacked into just the overcoat, I bought it in a medium to large and it is MASSIVE, Tripod calls it my wizard cape as it hits the ground and It gives me a very Gandalfy/ Professor Snape feel to my ensembles this winter.

Oh and the combat boots, got these in a 50% off sale they aren't leather which usually a non negotiable criteria for my shoe choice but I have worn the fuckers at least three times a week since I bought them and I plan on buying more in leather I think next time.

That's all folks! there should be more self indulgent wank I mean more blog posts... very very soon.

Update: Still alive will resume normal blogging very very soon

In the meantime thank you ever so much for the emails and the comments I will addressing and replying to them soon, internet access has been minimal and sketchy, I have been sick and work has been flat out!

I do have one confession though, in my my recent stupour I did purchase a pair of gold leather pants... yes gold coloured, real leather pants.

Outfit: all hipster in her chunky gold chains and double denim, she looks like she is going to see live music and drink beer from big arse bottles and take photos for the street-press.

Chambray Shirt: Thrifted

Singlet/ Tank: um Kmart?

Denim Skirt: Thrifted

Headscarf: Thrifted

Necklace: Fake gold chain from craft shop

Glasses: Zenni Optical

I have been away, not going to apologise (that's how we spell it here is OZ)  for it cos I ain't done nothing wrong.

The Outfit.. ooh how I loves me this shirt on my way home from getting a Colonoscopy / Endoscopy Double bill procedure and still doped up I swung by an Op Shop and saw this giant Chambray shirt for $5.00 I know how lucky am I? I mean most people regret the things on the day they have randoms shoving shit up your arse but not I.

When I'm wearing it out and about people (jealous co-workers and friends) having been referring to it as my art smock (as untied it goes down to my knees) but I prefer to refer to it as "the gem I found after my colonoscopy"

Shit I need to sort out my bookshelves.

Oh and the necklace was half a metre of $3.00 per metre gold chain from Lincraft with a clasp added. It burns when I wear it but "beauty is pain" or some other generic quote about beauty.

Outfit: what I wore when I was doing something this weekend, my memory is hazy

Kaftan: Got it at a vintage fair it's belted to make it look short and blousy

Leggings: ASOS Curve

Heels: Edward Meller

Necklace: Diva

Glasses: Zenni Optical

Rawr! I'm all clad in kitschy cheap leopard print and I like it.

Got this floor length leopard Kaftan/ Mu-mu at a Vintage fair a month and a bit ago along with the best vintage bag ever and I had intended on hemming it and making the kaftan a tunic length mini dress/ top but now I really like it all super crazy blousy and the fringe as hideous as it is is growing on me.

Oh and the shoes are my beloved 100% leather kitten heels from Edward Meller they are super comfy I got them for an absolute song (under $100 AUD) and they are a size 42 and a roomy 42 at that.

P.S. thanks for the lovely comments about my legs, I cannot stand my legs in particular my calves (they are actually wider than my lover thigh) and it was lovely to hear and made me more confident of rocking my calves out some more

Outfit: What I wore when taking photos of our spare room to put up onto the internet in order to get a flatmate.

Trench: lily0808168 via Ebay heres a live auction for it

Top: Evans

Shorts: Jeans I cut up

Shoes: Invisble Wedges from Gullible City

Carpet: came with the house

This photo is completely random, I was taking photos of the corner (we are looking for a new housemate) and noticed something speck like while attending the the speck the camera takes five photos in quick succession (I think she is broken); and  even though Im not prepared, I hear the warning beeps and from dozens of Outfit self protraits I subconciously pose. 4 of the shots where khaki blur this however was freakishly useable. and It means that I don't have take time off my busy Saturday (watching movies and scratching myself) creating content for this here page. Yay half arse blog entry.

I did chuck on a pair of stockings and boots and wear this up to the shops to buy a clothes drying rack and that was another highlight of my day.

I do love the trench I wear it everywhere, and the short adjustable sleeves make it perfect for th Aussie winter, I think I'm going to buy another one as I am literally wearing it out and the khaki colour (the buttons eep on falling off) is actually a really versatile flattering neutral. also it has this fab tulip hem that is so adorable, I ordered a 5X even though I'm squarely in their 3X sizing (heard reviews off their off sizing and have been super happy with the fit, and the price just shits on every other Trench out there.

Movie Inspiration: The Lady Eve (Picture Heavy)

Reasons to watch this film

• Henry Fonda in a Tux in 1941 is like Lady Viagra
• Barbara Stanwyck is sex in a dress
• You should be watching Preston Sturges films to see how romantic comedy is done
• It has a elderly Gay couple (ok they never identify as Gay but they are so smokin it*) which for 1941 is great
• plenty of sexual innuendo ( before the late 40's - 60's de-sexing of cinema)
• The costumes are tres fab.
• You will have the smug sense of satisfaction of being able to tell people you have seen something other than the "Single Ladies" in black and white.

Was blind but now I see.

Glasses from Zenni Optical

Well I think I have firmly established that I am poor well y'know crack** and whores*** don't buy themselves.

Ok I'm not a Crack** addict but as a grown up that's moved out of home 90% percent of my money goes toward my survival and the remaining 10% usually goes on olives and cheese and that leaves me with 14% for things to make my life easier such as soap and those lighters with the long bit so you can light the stove without burning yourself.

 Anyways as I was saying I don't have much money to spend on life improving items but I needed one for a while and I have been putting it off or ages due to their sheer cost a pair of glasses. I lost my beloved Pepe Jeans pair (as seen here) in thick black acetate with Transitions lenses somewhere (probably when I was drunk or at work or when I was drunk at work) and I was so distraught (well distraught to the value of $500) I have since been using some old readers to tide me over but I needed something and I needed it quick, I was squinting to watch television, and I couldn't recognize my boyfriend at a certain distance and so whilst perusing the blog-o-sphere I read "The Bargain Fatshionista's" New glasses post and thought to myself  "hmmm $8 glasses ? let's have a look and see how bad the cost is for Shipping to Australia..."

$9.95USD

Yeah I was surprised too well now I had no reason not to try as a) Australian Optometrists are hellishly expensive (crack and whores don't come cheap) you can barely get a pair of decent glasses for $99AUD here in OZ let alone $8USD and b) I had accidentally bumped into say five too many people that I would of spotted (and subsequently avoided) had I been wearing glasses.

So it was decided and I put aside some of my Crack** money (I aint giving up on my Whores*** yet) and went a shopping and here is what I got. P.S I'm not wearing any make-up and my eyebrows need to be separated again so shield your eyes if necessary.

" Kiki the Poet" (can't find this style on the website but pretty safe and generic yo')

"Kiki the slightly less angry poet (probably cos she got laid last night high five)"  or this style from Zenni Optical

"Kiki the abrasive, Lefty, Media Commentator" or this Style

And "Kiki the hmm are you sure you want to wear those outside?" or these

The quality is above what I was expecting for the price (I was expecting a four drawings of glasses) The aren't Highlander like (that means they are immortal and Kick Arse!) but I'm happy to be seen in public in all of them. Ooh! and I ordered them on 16th May and they got to me on the 24th which I was super happy with, I will order more pairs and probably shell out for a few with a poly carbonate lens (to combat the Communist satellite Lasers) but yeah I entered in my prescription and voila! they all were perfect. and I can see again

Thanks to Zenni Optical I can avoid people I want to avoid with so much ease. My Optometrist too

** Crack is a term I commonly use to refer to Peanut Butter

*** Whores is my term for my weekly magazine purchases (Grazia and The New Yorker)

Good Styling v Bad Styling featuring JIBRI and City Chic (pic heavy)

 

JIBRI Plus Size Sleeveless Striped Pansy Dress

This is good no great styling, the photographer, stylist and make-up artist have worked together and created a gorgeous lookbook for JIBRI inspired by Joan Crawford (no coathangers though), Old Style Glamour with a Hitchcock moodiness whilst remaining feminine, desirable and romantic. 

However City Chic has come up with...

I don't know the items in the photo but the image was taken from here City Chic's lookbook

Now you are probably thinking that I'm just this whingey girl who has created some City Chic bashing blog because of some random childhood trauma... well I'm not. I just think the City Chic lookbook shots are unflattering, amateurish and remind me of awful glamour shots (on a sheepskin rug yuk) instead of a brand trying to be cutting edge in the youth plus size market.

  And I think that comparing look books with another plus size designer who as an independent designer manages to keep her items at a very similar price point to a major manufacturer who utilises overseas factories to make their garments is also a very interesting point to mention (cough* you are too frickin expensive for the quality of garment you produce)

anyway lets compare more pictures.

Outfit: Generic work outfit (now with added colour)

Dress: ASOS Curve

Cardigan: Basque Woman

Opaques:  it's a full leg tattoo I got done to look like opaques

Shoes: Thrifted mens suede laceups I have ruined by splashing about in puddles

Necklace: Diva

Head Scarf: Thrifted

• ASOS had free shipping to Austalia a couple of weeks ago
• after seeing this dress on Natalie of Definatalie.com I decided I must have it or some variant of said dress
• it took longer than their pomised 10 business days to deliver fo which they suck but the dress is good and my boobs like nice so I will fogive them
• however it is too short and creases like a (insert your own metaphor for a heavily creased item or person)
• if you look closely you can see my polka dotted bra

Oh and if you are one of the bazillion people who came here fom Definatalie's neck o' the woods  hello, I hope I havent offended with my weekly references to my "Coporate Box" "Minge" or "Lady Garden" and thankyou Natalie for incluing me amongst some amazing and inspiring gals, it's such an honour.

Dea Evans Stylist: WTF?

I'm not a matching prude, I don't believe in rules, in fact I'm all about the Clash, but seriously? you are meant to put items together that a) make the buyer relate to the model b) highlight the benefits and design features of the individual items and c) make the buyer want to buy them.

Maybe it's me in my old age but this makes me go eurrggh! But her hair is lovely, I wonder what conditioner she uses?

Outfit: a.k.a the elephant scrotums second chance round

Dress: Asos Curve

Longline Sweater Vest: The Clothing Company

Opaques: stole them from the neighbours clothes line

Boots: Evans

Belt: found on the floor

Headscarf: thrifted

I tried again, and I'm still meh bout the outfit but i covers my tits and minge adquately so as not to offend to townsfolk. It will most likely get demoted to nightdress mainly becuse I spilled printer ink all over myself whilst illegally refilling the cartridge and have been appropriately been punished by trying to remove yellow ink out of my skin and this dress for the last day and a bit...sigh.

People you should know about: Serge Lutens (picture heavy)

Outfit: what I wore when I was hungover and forgot I had an 8:30 dentist appointment

Headscarf: Thrifted

Sweater: MySize Thrifted

Pants: Won them in a bar fight

Shoes: Converse

Scarf: a few yards of grey jersey knit knotted together.

Anyway I forgot this morning that I had a dentist appointment, and I was hungover from the traditional Australian activity of "after work drinks" and the other traditional Australian activity of "After, After work drinks" so I went stumbling out of the house his morning in my Haus frau garb.

I'm posting it, as I am joining everyone else blogging themselves without make-up and whilst I should say that 90% of pictures of me on this blog are without make-up as I literally take all my outfit photos at around 6:45 am before the sun is fully up, depending on my mood I apply the minimal make-up (habit formed as a make-up always clean and minimalfor the day) I wear in full light (another habit I have formed) in a little hidden area at my bus stop or at work in the ladies . I think hungover/ un made-up me is a good variant on the theme.

mmm sexy, dehydrated, still slightly drunk ol' me

Outfit: Black, like my cold dead heart

Jacket: beth Ditto for Evans

Shirt: traded some magic beans for it

Skirt: My Size

Opaques: I hvae no idea

Boots: Evans 

Scarf: Made it myself.

It's getting cold in Ye Olde Sydney Towne and the layers start a piling on, It becomes my least coourful period as most of my winter clothes are black (a result of my previous career as a make-up artist and their ability to be used as a tax deduction) Anyway yeah my colourful self will become a shivering monotone shell of a being by June and the colour in my ensembles will only be provided by spilled beverages, jokes about penises oh and accessories of course.

Speaking of which, I have been churning out cheap-and-slightly-nasty scarves from cotton, knit jersey just buy a few metres and sew or pin into a loop if you want a circle scarf or cut up into bits and knot if you want a necklush  

I might even churn out some instructions this weekend; it's scarily easy and minimal if any sewing is required and each scarf usually costs about $5- $10 to make.

It's late I go sleep now

Outfit: What I wore to Mothers day lunch (featuring trashy iphone in the bathroom picture)

Cardigan: Jane Davenport

Top: Vigilante Labs via Etsy

Skirt: Generic blacky/grey skirt

Shoes: Crocs...MUTHAFUKKA!

Necklace: Diva

Red Belt: came with a dress

Sunglassed tucked into top: Karen Walker.

(insert an interesting blurb about you outfit and why you chose to wear today's outfit here)

Music Inspiration: 70 Million by Hold Your Horses.

70 Million by Hold Your Horses ! from L'Ogre on Vimeo.

 They have used dozens of famous artworks as inspiration, and the make-up the styling everything is just tres adorable. P.S. I love French Pop music so this will not be my last French pop band mention

Outfit: what I wore to after work drinks

Dress: Kirrily Johnston for Maxshop

Belt: found it in a pile once

Leggings: Mesh insert Leggings 

 Shoes: I'm gonna say Evans

Why did I wear what I wore? Well I gots to be conservative at my job. Why? because my workplace is conservativeish and because if I had my tits out I'd get too many girls jealous at their sheer spectaculariness! and I'd get a formal warning by HR

.But after work was over I hitched the hemline up a a good foot and a half drank myself tipsy and went home inappropriately early.

Oh and why am I hold my spectacular breasts in this photo... well I got my flatmate/ boyfriend to take this here picture (there has to be a reason why I call him tripod ) and the only non blurred photo was the one where I'm holding my tits, it's like it subconsciously steadies him by focusing on them

Movie Inspiration: Hairspray (the original and best in my Opinion)

City Chic: April 2010 the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

The Good.

Mini Feather Fringe Skirt, Chiffon Frill Button Through Top and Peplum Long Sleeved Cardigan with Shoulder Pads 

All from City Chic

Ahh lovely, the skirt whilst possibly Minge visible is unique and cute, the top whilst it reeks of the fat-famous lily0808168 ruffle dress it is cute and sensible and it straddles several trends; The cardigan is my most lustworthy item I like the cut and how Fashion Hayley has been rocking it.

 The Bad. 

 Wide Leg Jean, Zip Me Skinny Jean,Corset Bootleg Jeans and Acid Wash Skinny Jeans

all from City Chic

Apparently City Chic customers in particular the ones who purchase denim have genetically stopped growing at a size 20-22, which led to so much of a financial ruin for City Chic in creating a size 24 for the abnormally sized City Chic customer it had to be removed.

Whilst it shouldn't effect me as I don't often buy denim from City Chic But it sucks because 

1. They offer pants up to a size 24 but not denim on their website Seriously WTF?
2. They are obviously trying to be competitive with the other Youth Orientated Plus Size branding like Evans and Torrid (blogger partners, fashion parades, online promotions have you Booked Crystal Renn yet?) and yes whilst understandably behind the Big Guys with a typically more expensive product, Australian Isolation, and a limited size range, Is reducing your highest size online in denim really going to help?
3. I feel sorry for fat anomalies who will not be able to purchase your jeans any more, the size 18 girls with the 24 arse and thighs who would adjust them with some crafty know how ( I myself have to buy 24-26-28 jeans and pin in the waist to accommodate my calves) and even your size 24 customers who had become quite accustomed to purchasing your jeans every few months as they wore out from being worn to death 
4. Every other "relevant" plus sized brand in Australia goes up to a 24 or has extended it's range to a 24

eh now I'm nit-picking but City Chic has the power to be a MAJOR brand in Australia and the world and in order to do that it has to step up it's game.

& The Ugly 

Faux Fur Vest Available at City Chic

GAH! stylist must be shot immediately, then the photographer who took the photo needs to be hog-tied then the web developer who put this online to make my eyes bleed needs to be locked in a basement; and I cannot even write what I would do to the designer who dreamt up this abomination! 

I have blocked the poor models eyes out to protect her dignity but I have included a link if you unlike me wish to purchase this item. Poor girl she's soo cute too and Aussie non white plus size models are few and far between, City Chic you better not have fucked up her career.